What are the first things you guys usually do when the Inquisitor first arrives in Skyhold?

Generally I tend to go around talking to the companions first, then head over and meet Hawke, War table next and then to Crestwood or any other area I feel like doing at that moment

Talk to all companions. Recruit Dagna and then create uber weapons and armor for myself and companions. * And Hawke also *Edit*. And with that time consuming mess taken care of, explore one of the new areas, most likely The Emerald Graves.

Mostly talking to companions too. After that, I head out again to do something else, then come back to do the rest you can do in Skyhold.

Usually I go to Val Royeaux to get some customisation bits for Skyhold then talk to everyone and open up Crestwood really. Given that is what the game recommends you do and I generally prefer to open up the areas in order really. Crestwood, Western Approach, Emerald Graves/Exalted plains/Hissing Wastes, and finally the Emprise and after I've dealt with that then I'll consider opening up the DLCareas Jaws and Descent. The order of the Graves Ecxalted Plains and Hissing Wastes changes though depending on the character and their specialization given sometimes I find I need to unlock a certain map first in order to get what I need to unloc kcertain specs. For example the rift mage spec and needing the Venatori tomes so sometimes I unlock the Hissing Wastes earlier in order to get the Venatori tomes in order to unlock it.

yes.

This is the exact moment where my half a dozen attempts to replay the game died 

exit skyhold > reenter > go to bedroom > change the grey atrocity that forced upon my character.

I shudder when I think of the time when that wasn't an option.

LOL This. I do think I talk to some people, take a break by going somewhere, then come back to change it.

It was like 20 minutes or so trying to find something that made my male elf not look ridiculous. The padded stuff made his arms look normal so I went with that. 

I always thought it was a sort of beige/khaki myself

I drop the items that I don’t use but want to save such as the crafted stormcoast amulet in the chest plus any leveled items I can’t use but want to later on

I get companions out of courtyard and fully recruit Dorian etc

Then dagna plus hawke and specialists

I also make sure I have Cassandra’s and dorians side quests so I don’t have to revisit areas to hunt venatori etc qq

Then it’s where the game really starts