My Personal, Definitive, Romance story

Mine is always with Kaidan, breakup or no. It may or may not start in ME3 but I just like the pairing, largely because I like him. The stuff you think makes Liara a great pairing for me makes her a good friend. Didn't she kind of not have any time for you in ME2 anyway? She even acknowledges she wasn't there for him when she shows him the beacon/hologram she created. Not points against her. It just puts her in the same place as Ash and Kaidan.

My favourite personal romance story is a bit fucked up, but I ended up enjoying it way more than I thought.
My 3rd run, my first FemShep, was a broken Shepard. I had Colonist and Ruthless picked out for her, she was scared of batarians and in general suspicious of aliens (that changed though). I addition she didn't want to get to close to anyone because of what had happened to her family and the years of pain it brought her.
I let her fall for Kaidan in ME1 and the reason for my Shepard to save him instead of Ashley was because she didn't want to lose him in that moment, finding herself in exact the situation she always wanted to avoid. She doesn't get involved with Kaidan in ME3 again because of all this and what had happened on Horizon.
I let her play a flirting game with Vega because she finds it fun and likes James a lot, but she ends up falling in love with him without realising it at first. And since I played her as damaged and lonely, she pushes him to the one-night-stand in the Citadel DLC. They both regret that night, but I head-canon that James and her still ended up together afterwards. He thought she had died when activating the Crucible and realises how important she was to him after all. Head-canons are great. Sorry not sorry

Mine may be relatively simple.

Spacer/Ruthless- gets the job done, can be cold/aloof but is loyal to his crew (A Father to His Men) and generally willing to help out decent people and enact switft and terrible retribution upon those who are dicks. Romance wise:

In ME1 he gets together with Ashley because they're attracted to each other and have enough in common.

In ME2 there's definitely a "moved on" vibe plus Ashley's not being particularly sporting. So he pursues his growing affection for Miranda. Turns out they're more suited to each other in just about every way and Miranda actually makes him realize Ashley's limitations.

In ME3, it's only been 6 months. Shepard was just about to say screw this and break out, try to find Miranda and the rest of his crew and try to do something to prepare for the Reapers when, whoops, they're already here.

Now here's the part I can never actually do in game: Miranda dies at Sanctuary and Shepard, his last and strongest tie to humanity cut (he's never really been much of a people person) grabs the control rods and ascends. His first order of business? Immediately bring Miranda back. Now they're even. Also something about offering to ascend her at the end of her lifespan so they can be together.

I had two Shepards

The first was paragon femshep who romanced Kaidan in ME1, was numb and disoriented after waking up in ME2 and heartbroken after Horizon so she and Thane kind of gravitated towards each other. She genuinely cared for Thane, but knew their time was limited and still loved Kaidan. So after losing Thane in ME3 she and Kaidan got back together.. dumbass lines about cheating aside..

the second Shepard was rengade male with Ashley in ME1, slept with Jack in ME2 then got with Miranda and went back to Ashley in ME3.. Miranda had a very tragic story for that particular playthrough and I still feel like a monster.

The only proper Romance for me is Kaidan.

No romance in ME1, no romance in ME2, then a beautiful and romantic conclusion to the series with Kaidan as the man by your side. lol, but I know that's not everybody's cup of tea!

One thing I love about this romance is that it is still heavily implied that your best friends are Liara and Garrus. I love how much the emphasized Shepard's friendship with them...

So, I recently played ME2 and ME3 for the first time with a gibbed ME1 save where Femshep romanced no one. It was my intent to romance Kaidan in ME3 at this time. but didn't want the feeling of cheating on anyone. Regardless of my general knowledge of romance options for a Femshep, I went in blind. Right before I started, I even commented that I would say that Femshep loved Kaidan all along and just never acted on it. Then the start of ME2 happens and the dialogue was great, telling Kaidan to get off the ship and save himself. Adn there was this long look. And I was like, "This is the moment that my Femshep realizes she's totally in love with Kaidan." And then she died. 

She was playing fast and loose without the restrictions and rules of the Alliance to dictate her actions. She also had a bit of an identity crisis (consider I didn' tknow any of the companions and would ask questions like, What is Cerberus? Don't kill people! -Whatdya mean don't kill people, you're the one who told me to kill people!) So even though she had the memory of being in love with Kaidan, and that memory was refreshed when she saw Kaidan on ME2... Life, her 2nd life, had taken her away from all that and the man that made her feel that way. She flirted with jacob, Garrus, and Thane simultaneously, but when Thane called her Siha, accepting her for everything that she was, a death angel of his goddess, she pushed her memories of Kaidan away. Embraced her new life and embraced Thane. 

Their time together was far too short. And Femshep was so angry at the Alliance for locking her up and keeping her away from the man she loved whehn he could have died anytime from his disease. She was saving the Galaxy for the Galaxy, and her friends, but definitely not for the Aliiance.   Then Kai Leng killed him.... Femshep had been walking into Life Support when thinking about Thane all game. She never  walked into Life Support again after that.  Thing is, Femshep changed after this. She no longer hoped to live after saving the Galaxy. She just had one job left to do...and she'd do it. And then see Thane across the Sea. That was her guiding sentiment. Save the Galaxy-- See Thane.

She had lunch with Kaidan on the Citadel and he confessed his love for her. But Thane's death was too recent, and the love she'd felt for Kaidan from...literally another lifetime. She told him she'd like to remain friends.  He took it like a champ. And she had "positive feels with a regretful hint of what could have been," when she left him that night.

Game got serious again. Memory allowed her to torture herself a bit as she recalled Thane's smile when he thought of visiting the desert and the way he called her Siha. FemShep wakes up in sexy underwear and the camera happened to focus on the empty bed next to her.  Tapped on my space hamster's box. Femshep knows she's going to die. She just feels it. I still feel guilty that he's going on to someone new. Hopefully Kaidan will take the little guy. Shepherd leaves her cabin and goes to the memorial and I imagine Shepherd putting her hand on the name and saying,

"This is for you, baby."

Kaidan sounded downright choked when he said, "we know this is goodbye." The whole conversation just heavy enough and with awkward pauses---their having a thing for each other that they decided not to act on. The feelz.

Then Javik, who'd been her best Soldier bud, and if she'd not loved Thane, may have smooched on... begged her not to leave him behind at the Evac site. Which  makes me think that my Femshep left two broken hearts behind.

And when thinking, agonizing, about what to do at the end. She thought of what Thane had told her to do. 
"he told me to fight. To end the war. And that we would see each other across the sea. He sacrificed himself. Our time was so short."
And she'd been looking forward since his death to her own death. So she can rejoin him across the sea.

"Destroy may restart the war between Synthetic and Organic life. Destroy the peace between them now. Destroy EDI. I don't think Thane would want everyone to become a weird hybrid with no discussion. I certainly wouldn't." The Controlling the Reapers thing just seemed chilling; will my Shepherd's soul find Thane's across the sea if she's part of a computer system for eternity? But it allows for a couple of things. Everyone right now can just be as they are. And considering she sided with the Geth, and they helped the War Effort, it's possible... There is hope that the "cycle" of synth vs Org won't happen again. So it's a weird but hopeful option.

But the AI didn't just say Sheperd would die. He said, "You will lose everything that you are. and you will be completely disconnected and removed." To me, that means that, ya... Shepherd will be removed from the cycle of life/death and the afterlife. 

I'm sorry, Thane. I won't see you across the sea.

"I got this, baby."

"I knew you would, Siha."

My Shepherd sacrificed the "rest" she looked so forward to for the betterment of all humanity in the name of the man she loved.

And this whole romance story arc/concept has haunted me a bit since I finished a couple weeks back. I haven't played ME since. I'm a DA girl, much more upbeat. 

ME1
Commander John Shepard, an Earthborn War Hero and Adept in the Systems Alliance, felt an immediate attraction to Staff Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko since the moment Captain Anderson introduced them. At first, he didn’t think much of it; he’s been attracted to plenty of men before and has managed to keep things professional, and he had every intention of doing the same with Alenko. The attraction became harder to ignore once they started developing a friendship, however. Despite his best efforts to conceal it, Dr. Chakwas could tell what was going on based on the way John prodded her for information on Kaidan. In time, John’s attraction evolved into a serious crush. Under normal circumstances, he might have acted on his feelings, but the Alliance had strict rules against fraternization, and John took his job very seriously, especially since he became the first human Spectre. His priority was stopping Saren and representing humanity to the best of his ability. His personal feelings would have to take a backseat. Besides, John didn’t have many friends before being assigned to the Normandy, and it became clear that Kaidan was his best friend. He valued that friendship too much to risk ruining it.

ME2
Their meeting on Horizon didn’t go the way John had hoped. Since waking up in that lab, he found himself, on multiple occasions, wondering what Kaidan was doing at that very moment. He didn't put enough thought into what he would actually say once he finally found him. It was foolish of him, even selfish, to ask Kaidan to abandon his post, commit treason, and throw his career away just to have Kaidan near him again. Kaidan had every reason not to trust Cerberus. He has seen what they were capable of first have. He knew they studied the Rachni, husks, and Thorian Creepers, all of which had some ties to mind control. John couldn’t fault him for considering the possibility that Cerberus had done something to him. Hell, Miranda said it herself that if she had it her way, there would be some kind of chip in Shepard’s brain right now, and that's not even mentioning the fact that Cerberus actually created a clone of Shepard, though they didn't know it at the time. Kaidan's behavior was justified, and John knew it. Still, it was nice to see him again. Besides, the mission they were on very well could have been a one way ticket. As much as he missed Kaidan, John was relieved that he wasn’t bringing yet another person he cared about on what was considered a suicide mission.

ME3
Kaidan struggled with the truth behind John’s identity. It wasn’t because he was disloyal; nothing could be further from the truth. It was because he cared so deeply for John that he knew he was a vulnerable target. He just couldn't risk allowing Cerberus to exploit his feelings in order to manipulate him into furthering their agenda. As much as he wanted to believe the man he fell in love with three years ago truly was back, he needed to be cautious. He had to know for sure. But seeing John in action, talking to him when he visited Kaidan at the hospital, watching him put his life on the line during the Udina showdown—putting his trust in Kaidan to make the right call—it was all the proof he needed. The man before him was John. There was no longer any doubt.

Upon that revelation, he finally allowed himself to indulge in some of the memories of old times. He regretted that he never told John how he felt back then, and promised himself he wasn’t going to let this chance pass him by again. Threat of court-martial might have been a deterrent when they were merely chasing after a rogue Spectre, but now they were fighting a war where the survival of their entire species was at risk. If he was going to die fighting the Reapers, he’d at least wanted to die knowing that he gave love a chance.

John was stunned when Kaidan confessed his feelings to him. He was content having his best friend back on the crew; he didn’t want to press his luck. He had hoped Kaidan felt the same way he did, but he dared not make the first move. With everything else he was dealing with at once, rejection was not something he was sure he could handle. Not from him, at least. But to find out that the person you care about more than anyone in the galaxy feels the same way about you, and always has, made everything—all the suffering and hardships he's ever had to endure throughout his life—it was all worth it.

In Kaidan, John found everything his life was missing: stability, safety, warmth, devotion, honesty, support, compassion, trust, and of course, love. He was his safe place to land. For the first time in his life, John felt like he had a home, and it wasn't a place; it was a person. The two of them almost felt guilty. The galaxy was burning around them, yet they’ve never been happier in their lives. And the crew was also happy for them. If anyone deserved to find a bright spot in all this darkness, it was these two. Karin Chakwas was especially elated. She knew they were practically meant for each other since the beginning, and she’s come to think of both of them as family. But even her joy was dwarfed by that of Admiral Anderson once the news had reached him. The man practically raised John, and he had gotten to know Kaidan quite well, too. There was no one he’d rather see John settle down with. He was immensely proud of them both. It was no coincidence that he gave John an apartment on the Citadel soon after he discovered that John had found the love of his life.

Victory against the reapers was finally won, but the price was far too high. Admiral Anderson, EDI, and the geth were all lost in the final battle. The months that followed were especially difficult. Aside from the physical pain of recovering from near death, John was wracked with guilt. He kept wondering if there was anything he could have done differently. But deep down, he knew that he was left with no other alternative. But learning to live in the aftermath of the Reaper War was not a task John faced alone. He had the best support group in the galaxy, not the least of which was his amazing boyfriend, Kaidan.

Once out of the hospital, John and Kaidan spent months planning their wedding—that is, inbetween Spectre missions. They made a special request with the Council to only be sent on them as a team. The council was in no position to refuse the saviors of the galaxy, especially since their own inactivity in the face of John's warnings was a major factor in rendering the Milky Way so ill-prepared for the reaper invasion. Besides, John and Kaidan had proven to be most effective when they are working together.

John only wished Anderson could have been there to see his big day. The ceremony was relatively small and intimate considering their notoriety. Karin officiated the ceremony, Wrex and Tali were the best man and woman, and the rest of the Normandy crew filled out the guest list along with Kaidan’s relatives, Admiral Hackett, Kahlee Sanders, Urdnot Bakara, and Kolyat Krios. Also present at their wedding was the tablet with the names of the fallen. John and Kaidan agreed that they wanted them there, even if only symbolically.

As they shared their first kiss as husbands, they both had to pinch each other to make sure they weren't dreaming. Even with the reapers gone, they knew their work would never be done. But they also knew that, together, they could handle anything the galaxy could throw at them.

My canon Shepard is an Earthborn/War Hero. Some backstory for context. Shepard was orphaned at the age of six, and his mother left behind no records of who she was before he was conceived. During his late teens, when Shepard was working as a low level enforcer for the Reds, Shepard fell into a friends with benefits relationship with the gang's leader. At the age of seventeen, the leader of Reds betrayed Shepard during a theft, which resulted in Shepard's secondary exposure to eezo. Shepard made it to a public place before he passed out from his injuries, and a good Samaritan called an ambulance. When Shepard woke up several days later, he lashed out, wanting to immediately get back at the Reds' leader for turning on him, revealing his newly awakened biotics. Shepard met Anderson for the first time when he was sent in to convince Shepard to use his new powers for the Alliance. Shepard agreed out of a desire to prove that he was more than just a thug and a tool, and spent the next year cleaning up his act to meet recruitment requirements. Shepard's time on the streets gave him a head start in melee combat and weapons, so he chose to specialize as a Vanguard, later receiving advanced training as a Shock Trooper.

Though Shepard was happy in the Alliance, and had found a father figure in Anderson and to a lesser extent Hackett, he wasn't close to most of his comrades. Many of them gave him a wide berth, sometimes because of his biotics, sometimes because they still thought he was a thug with no use except extra muscle, and sometimes both. That changed on Elysium. Shepard originally started to retreat with the others, but he realized that a lot of colonists were going to die and, remembering how many times he had to fight for his life because the people who were supposed to protect him wouldn't and his promise upon enlistment to be better than that, Shepard unleashed biotic hell on the raiders. With all the accolades Shepard received for that stunt, he found that suddenly everyone wanted to be on his good side. Shepard thought it was what he wanted, but found that being on the receiving end of hero-worship wasn't all it was cracked up to be, and to many people he was still a tool, just one with a different use. Shepard received his invitation to the N7 program, and remained distant from most of his fellow soldiers.

ME1: Shepard was attracted to Kaidan almost immediately, but although he was a Spectre and wouldn't get in legal trouble, Shepard realized that making a pass at a subordinate, especially one he didn't know very well yet, would do nothing but make everyone on the ship uncomfortable and distrustful of him. As he got to know Kaidan, Shepard found he really like him as a person. Their biotics were an obvious point of commonality, and they had many of the same ideas about the Alliance and its responsibilities toward both humanity and its allies. They often talked about places they visited and missions they worked on in their decade of service. When Kaidan objected to Shepard's accusation that he was judging all aliens by Vyrnus's example, Shepard felt like he found a kindred spirit in someone who refused to use his past as an excuse to be as bad as the people who had hurt him. However, the revelation that Kaidan had been in love with a girl when he went through all that led Shepard to worry that Kaidan was straight, and decided not to say anything about his feelings until he saw some sign to the contrary.

Kaidan, for his part, was likewise attracted to Shepard very early in the hunt for Saren, but he had no desire to make things awkward by hitting on a straight man, so decided not to say anything until he had some sign that Shepard might reciprocate. Though, deep down, Kaidan didn't really think Shepard would be interested in him even if he was gay/bi. Still, he didn't have many friends, or people he felt he could talk to without being judged, and treasured finding those things in Shepard a great deal. It also made Kaidan feel much better about his own powers to meet someone whose biotics had such a positive influence on his life.

By all rights, the romantic tension should have come to a head on Virmire. Shepard justified his decision to sacrifice Ashley because he needed Kaidan's technical skills for the bomb, and there were too many questions about Saren and the geths' capabilities to be sure that they wouldn't be able to disable the bomb if left to their own devices. Privately, Shepard was questioning his own motives, and he wasn't able to answer the question of whether or not Ashley would still be alive if not for his feelings for Kaidan. Shepard did seriously consider telling Kaidan how he felt, but decided that Kaidan felt guilty enough then without having to ask that question.

Shepard didn't realize that Kaidan was already wondering if his survival indicated that Shepard had feelings for him. Certainly in all that time Shepard had shown no interest in the various women and asari who had propositioned him. Kaidan wanted to ask Shepard about it, but at the time he couldn't face the possibility that Ashley died because of Shepard's feelings for him. Even if he had, a frantic race to stop an apocalyptic threat seemed like a very bad time to discuss romance. He decided to wait until the time was right to talk about it with Shepard.

ME2: The right time never came. After the Collector attack, Kaidan spent the next two years grieving for the man he'd fallen in love with, and kicking himself for not saying something when he had the chance. When Kaidan started receiving reports that Shepard was alive and working with Cerberus, he wanted to believe that it wasn't what it looked like, but his attempts to get answers from Anderson went nowhere. Then, when Shepard nonchalantly brought up working with Cerberus, it confirmed everything Kaidan had been hearing. He wanted to believe that Shepard had been telling him the truth about his reasons for working with Cerberus, but they were the same people who had turned an entire colony into husks. If Shepard was telling the truth about being on a Cerberus operating table for two years, who knew what they had put in him? Though Kaidan had seen enough on Horizon to believe that the Collectors were a real threat, he didn't have nearly enough to justify deserting his post to work with a terrorist group that didn't give much to prove that they were really working to stop the Collectors. Kaidan hoped that Shepard was telling the truth and would be able to stop the Collectors, but he couldn't let go of the hurt and betrayal of thinkin that his two years of heartbreak had been wasted.

From the moment he woke up, Shepard used every chance he got to try to get in touch with Kaidan. When he learned Kaidan was on Horizon, Shepard was so excited to see him again that it didn't occur to him what things would have looked like to Kaidan. The wake up call Shepard received threw him off balance so badly that he couldn't even form a good explanation to allay Kaidan's worries. Though Shepard was aware of it intellectually, the meeting with Kaidan was the first time Shepard was forced to confront the fact that the Lazarus Project was unprecedented, and he really did look to the rest of the galaxy like a traitor who had faked his death to return to his real masters. Though Shepard was angry at Kaidan initially, learning that the Illusive Man had been the one to leak the reports Kaidan had seen made Shepard realize that the situation must have looked even worse to Kaidan than he had thought, and that Kaidan likely wasn't off-base about his warnings. Shepard started to get more suspicious of the Illusive Man's claims about why his original squad wasn't available. Shepard's suspicions were confirmed when he discovered that the Illusive Man had lied through his teeth about Liara's current activities.

After the fiasco on the Collector Ship, Shepard talked the matter over with the SR1's remaining alumni in a private spot on Omega. Shepard, Garrus and Tali all realized what the Illusive Man was doing to intentionally keep Shepard away from his allies in the Alliance and the Council. Though Garrus had initially been angry about Kaidan's behavior on Horizon, he agreed with Shepard that none of them would have reacted any differently if they'd seen the reports Kaidan received. It was Tali who raised the suggestion that the Illusive Man focused on Kaidan more than the rest of the SR1 squad because of how close he was to Shepard, and that turning Shepard and Kaidan against each other may have been the backup plan. The realization that the Illusive Man had intended for Kaidan to be abducted by the Collectors because of his relationship with Shepard was the moment Shepard vowed to kill the Illusive Man.

Everyone from the SR1 was much more suspicious of Cerberus and their intentions than they already were. When the Illusive Man tried to convince Shepard that the Collector Base should be preserved and used against the Reapers, Shepard was torn. Even with his concerns about Indoctrination, he could see the value of using the enemy's power against them. But then Kaidan's warning on Horizon flashed through Shepard's mind. Cerberus was not to be trusted. If asked about his decision, Shepard readily credited Kaidan's warning about Cerberus as the deciding factor.

ME3: When Shepard turned himself in, he hoped that would be enough to prove to Kaidan that he was still himself. Unfortunately, they weren't able to talk to each other while Shepard was under house arrest. They also didn't have any opportunity to really talk on the way to Mars. When Kaidan asked Shepard what he knew about Cerberus's presence, Shepard got angry again. He couldn't believe that destroying the Collector Base against the Illusive Man's orders and turning himself in wasn't enough. Things calmed down a bit when they found out what Cerberus was doing to their soldiers, and Shepard realized that, more than anything else, Kaidan was worried about him. Shepard swore they would talk properly as soon as they had the time, awkwardness be damned. Seeing Kaidan almost get killed made Shepard realize that whatever resentment he held over Kaidan not automatically trusting him wasn't worth it. As had happened after Horizon, once Shepard had some time to step back and look at the situation objectively, he realized how suspicious it must have looked for Cerberus to show up so soon after Shepard was released. Shepard was angry at himself for continuously allowing his desire to be close to Kaidan again cloud his judgement, and swore he wouldn't let it happen again.

During one of his visits, Shepard learned that Kaidan had compiled all the reports he had gotten about Shepard between the attack on the SR1 and Shepard turning himself in, in an effort to clear the air. That was when Shepard finally understood how badly Kaidan had been left in the dark about the whole situation. In particular, Shepard decided that he would need to have words with Anderson and Hackett about thinking that Kaidan didn't need to know that the Illusive Man had tried to convince Shepard to preserve the Collector Base. Shepard decided it was time to fix the root of the problem and told Kaidan everything that happened between waking up on the Lazarus Station and turning himself in. While Kaidan kicked himself for being so stupid now that he finally knew the whole story, Shepard felt like they could finally get back the friendship they'd had before, and maybe take it further since Kaidan had reacted well to Shepard's flirting in the previous visit. Shepard made sure Kaidan knew that, as much as it may have hurt at the time, Kaidan's warning about Cerberus had made a difference.

Everything seemed to be going great until the coup. When Shepard and Kaidan confronted each other over Udina's treason, Shepard clamped down on his first instinct and reminded himself that pointing a gun at a Councilor would look bad in any situation. All he could do is tell the truth and hope Kaidan believed him. Kaidan was torn, for a moment, he wondered if everything Shepard had told him since they started talking again had been a lie, but he realized how big a stretch that was, and chose to trust Shepard. As far as Shepard was concerned, that was it. He and Kaidan had their friendship back, and any other bumps in the road could be dealt with. When Kaidan returned to the Normandy, Joker was the only one to voice any objection, and Shepard set him straight after his second snide remark. Garrus and Liara, and later Tali, were all genuinely happy, and Shepard even bought Kaidan a Paladin pistol as a welcome-back present.

By the time the Normandy returned to the Citadel again, Kaidan had given it a great deal of thought, and realized he was on his third chance. He had wasted his first chance and utterly screwed up his second chance; Kaidan knew that there would be no fourth chance. So he asked Shepard out to lunch and broached the subject. Shepard couldn't believe his luck when he confirmed what Kaidan was talking about, and neither could Kaidan once Shepard reciprocated. It was all they had wanted since they met three years ago.

One night, as Shepard lay awake with a sleeping Kaidan in his arms, Shepard realized that he had finally found what he had been looking for since he decided to enlist. Kaidan didn't judge Shepard for his past, but he also didn't put Shepard on a pedestal; Kaidan was not afraid to call Shepard out if he thought Shepard crossed the line, even as Kaidan did his best to care for Shepard's physical and emotional well-being. Kaidan was one of the incredibly few people to see Shepard as a whole person, and he loved that person warts and all. Even more than when they knew each other on the SR1, Shepard wanted to be worthy of Kaidan's affections, whether they were platonic or romantic, and that gave him more strength than ever to resist his darker impulses.

When the time came to end the Reaper threat, Shepard never did trust the Catalyst's claims about Control and Synthesis, but when he remembered Kaidan's plea not to leave him behind, Shepard knew he couldn't take the risk on the remote chance that the Catalyst was telling the truth. It was his promise to return to Kaidan that gave Shepard the will to survive the injuries he took in destroying the Reapers.

That was way too long. What does it say about me that I just wrote 2509 words about this?

So I thought my romance would be Thane forever but then Liara appeared.

My canon Shepard romance no one in ME1 because she's a professional and the romance weren't appealing to me. In ME2 she also doesn't go for anyone because she's paranoid and doesn't really trust them easily (Earth made her cynical). And finally in ME3 where she's falling apart, she realises that Liara was always there for her, my Shepard allowed herself to be vulnerable with her. Hell she was instrumental in bringing Shepard back to life.

It also helps that Liara is not as naive as before, I would have felt like I was taking advantage of her hero worship or something. In ME3 they both grew as people and have been through a lot together and so my Shepard fumbled awkwardly trying to tell Liara that they'd "be good together". It was pretty cute, though I felt really bad rejecting Kaidan then.

I do wonder though if when Liara and Shepard were saying goodbye with a last mind meld, did Liara get pregnant then? Kind of like to have some little piece of Shepard with her no matter what? I suppose that'll remain headcanoned depending on my mood or something.

I like how people find one that works and just end up with "this is the canon version and nothing else matters". I do, too. I always romance Kaidan. I once tried to go the Steve Cortez route but backed out. It just didn't feel right. It's not even entirely a sexuality issue. In MEA I've had Ryder sleep with 5 separate people in one playthrough. I think it's because 4 of them are "flings" and the one full on romance is lacking. I never got that feel in the OT. As I said, I tried Cortez and I tried Liara but those didn't bring out that certain something in me like Kaidan did. I will always ship Shepard and Kaidan and I never get tired of reading fanfic about them (including one where they have kids post-war).