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This is an interesting one. The divide between critics and audience scores was so wide it was practically a chasm. Critics felt it was a mediocre or average watch while general audiences loved every minute of it. Not having watched it myself I was inclined to believe audience scores... until I watched a YT review that claimed Peach was an insufferable girl boss, Mario was a punching bag, etc. Then AJ released his review and, contrary to my expectations, he also felt it was an average watch, to the point the always-cheerful Alex called it a "joyless, soulless, exploitation of nostalgia of an IP." So I did what I often do in these cases and watched it to judge for myself.

I've always been more of a Zelda fan despite having played a few Mario games, like Super Mario Bros on the Super Nintendo or Mario Kart 64, which I loved! Perhaps that explains, to some extent, why the movie didn't appeal as much to me. It came across as very by the numbers and the amazing animation couldn't distract me from the fact I felt nothing throughout. Is Peach a girl boss? Sure, but the only thing that rubbed me the wrong way about it was that gratuitous line of her having completed a trial on her first try, one that NOBODY completes on their first try. That line was so unnecessary. Oh, and there was this time when she's asked about who Mario is and she replies, "He's... not important!" Haha, what a laugh, that's exactly what I imagine Princess Peach would say. Oh, and Mario doesn't save Peach because, well, princesses save themselves in 2023 (plus, Luigi is the new princess). Okay, maybe I'm more annoyed at this than I thought. To be fair, there was a report about how this movie was originally gonna have Peach as the star of the film until Nintendo stepped in and told Hollywood in no uncertain terms not to f*** around with their franchise. Clearly, Hollywood was still reluctant, as traces can still be seen of the original "Super Peach Bros" concept. I wonder what this movie would've looked like without any Hollywood interference.

Anyway, back on topic, Mario fails time and again during his first trial, but I took it as a fun reminder of how the player will fail numerous times before getting good at the game. I was actually more annoyed at the movie pulling the Marvel card of constantly subverting (Mario's) triumphant moments with a gag, something that occurs right until the very end of the movie. We've come to expect this nowadays so when that moment starts to rear its head you irrevocably know what comes next. So, yeah, Mario doesn't get very super until the last act of the movie, where he teams up with Donkey Kong to play a level of the game, his game. This scene was one of the highlights of the movie and, considering the amount of interaction Mario and DK have, this movie should've been titled, "Mario and Donkey Kong," 'cause Luigi is mostly absent throughout the entire thing. The (two) kart sequences were also fun times, then again Mario Kart 64 is one of my favourites.

What else? Voice acting was okay, I didn't have any problems with it. Toad was a great little character and the movie would've been lessened without him. I think Mario's training sequence would've been more hilarious with Sergeant Toad in charge (he's just so hyped to go on an adventure!). Bowser didn't have a whole lot to do besides sitting around and playing the piano until the final act. Additionally, the movie suffers from pacing issues, going from greatest hit to greatest hit without giving the characters time to breathe and bond with one another (save for maybe one half-hearted attempt between Mario and DK). I think the movie could've benefited from another 10-20 minutes of runtime.

In the end, I feel the Super Mario Bros movie is an average watch, but you're bound to get more mileage from it if you're a Mario fan. I do know Nintendo's already working on a Legend of Zelda movie so I'm definitely looking forward to that. Maybe that will be my Nintendo movie.

Well, it's here, the live action adaptation nobody asked for, or at least not in its current form. Basics out of the way first. Is this a good Saint Seiya adaptation? Nope. "Inspired by" or "loosely based on" might be a better description. To be fair, it was impossible to properly adapt the material into a 100 min film (and with a 60 million dollar budget, but we'll get there), even if it suggests it'll be the first of many (depending on the box office). Some elements are there, like Marin's training of Seiya, which is the movie's highlight, or even a twisted version of the Steel Cloths, this time developed by the main antagonist, the Phoenix Force Guraad (Famke Janssen), to prepare for her fight against the gods. Unfortunately, the movie misses the mark by a wide margin with the ugly, clunky, and completely different, design of the armours, but particularly Seiya's, as it looks nothing like the Pegasus cloth we know from the anime. If you don't get the amours right in Saint Seiya, you've already lost half the battle.

The other big problem this movie has is its CGI. It's... not great. Perhaps aware of this, and its 60 million dollar budget, it is used rather sparingly throughout the movie. Minor things like the cosmos enveloping Seiya's body are okay, but CGI during the full-fledged fight against "character I won't name but that you can probably guess" (he's in the trailer) with that obviously fake background looks pretty bad, something that isn't helped by the armour design. Honestly, a 3D animation of this would look way better. And since we're talking about the big fight, not only did Pegasus' famous Meteor Fist did not live up to its animated counterpart but they didn't even build up to it with the music, which was rather generic throughout. I'll listen to the OST on Spotify later, but I can barely recall any of the music used so you can imagine it's not particularly memorable.

Any positives? I liked Mackenyu as Seiya, who looks like a younger Ji Chang Wook, and Madison Iseman as Sienna/Athena was okay. Commendably, despite the fast pacing of the movie and between all the action sequences, they manage to work in some quiet moments for the two to develop some kind of relationship. Nothing to write home about, but at least they tried. And, like I mentioned earlier, Marin's training of Seiya is the best part of the movie by far (as a bonus, her armour is the more faithful to the source material). The rest of the cast is rather forgettable, even if Sean Bean tries to lend the movie some air of legitimacy.

Not the worst movie ever, but it doesn't look like Toei Animation nor Sony Pictures put a whole lot of effort into this adaptation, so I can almost guess they have no plans for a sequel, unless it somehow makes a shitload of money at the box office, and that's unlikely with Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 right around the corner. It's a shame because with a longer runtime, faithful armour designs, a better soundtrack, some decent CGI... in short, with a greater budget, Knights of the Zodiac would've been better. As it stands, you're probably better off skipping this one or waiting for it to come to streaming.

PS: Obvious rip-off of X-Men 3 is obvious. I wonder if Famke Janssen suggested that.

So I was not entirely right about the Saint Seiya movie not using the original score. You can hear a slower version of Pegasus Ryu Sei Ken at the beginning of this theme.