The first time I lost my praetorian butt lazor virginity.

When I heard and witness the mystical and mysterious legend of the praetorian butt lazor I was blown away. At first, I thought it was some weird hokus pokus with pyjack infused space magic conceived from Harbinger's pregnant body. But then this seductive and alluring crab that can flash it's purple bubble of bull shittery, flashed me its butt and fired its lazer like a parting gift as my whole team left on the shuttle.

This is how I reacted.