Alec Ryder changing with your CC is kinda a lie.

I was under the impression that FatherRyder would take two-thirds of his features from your chosen gender and the rest from your sibling. Maybe that is what they intended and it is still possible. Give him the face of the son, plus the eye color and the skin tone from the daughter. Done.

I get it. They wanted us to feel something for Alec since he is integral to their narrative. I think we could have bonded with him more easily if we could customize him ourselves. They didn't trust us enough to do it.