Official notice of intent to sue.

Dear sir or madam; or whatever you identify as, I'm a Krogan for example.

I am delivering official notice to BioWare, through their unofficial forums that I intend to sue them for ruining my life.

Not least for ruining Mass Effect.

You see, last night was the same as the night before. I tried to put my controller down and go to bed, when PeeBee started started talking like an Elcor.

I immediately started laughing and woke up my wife, who does not, identify as a Krogan. She informed me it was 2am and she'd been waiting for this to happen.

"You're obsessed with an Asari again."

She said.

"It's me or the game this time Zip, I won't compete with a digital character for your affection for another 8 years."

So naturally I'm being divorced by my wife. Wich involves a lot of legal fees. Fee's that I don't think I should have to pay. Least of all child support.

Especially not since any of this is my fault. I'm not the one who created these characters, I didn't make it so the save points were so far apart that I had to keep playing for six hours straight, falling in love along the way, I'm not even the one asking for a divorce here.

So it only seems fair to me that BioWare help recover the costs. I'm happy to settle out of court Bio, you can contact me at ForTuchanka76@Gmail.com

I look forward to not having to take this to court on behalf of all the dusgruntled fans who simply enjoy this game too much.

Zip, out.