Just thinking out loud but does gay/straight mean anything when it comes to romancing aliens?

I'm a straight woman and though I was able to find Garrus attractive on some level (same with Kandros and Avitus), I don't feel that way toward Vetra or Nyreen or any other female turian. Because regardless of alien anatomy, I still see one as a man and one as a woman. The voice certainly is part of it... maybe a big part since all those male turians I named have voices I really like. But... the important thing is that the game tells me they're male. And they sound male, identify as male... there's a definite contrast between Garrus' swagger (which to me comes across as traditionally masculine) and the flirty, more traditionally feminine way Vetra moves in that first scene of her.

It's not even about genitalia... It's a game, so, it hardly matters, and, I'd totally go for a romance with a trans- male character if they ever made one. Provided he identifies as male and sounds male enough I don't care what's in his fictional pants provided I enjoy how he's written. So what some alien may or may not have down there doesn't matter either. Hell, I would love to see a romanceable male quarian, even if he never gets out of his suit for safety reasons. It's not even about sexual attraction - I wouldn't be DTF a turian in real life, male or not... yikes! Though, who knows, maybe if turians were a real thing I was used to seeing my entire life, I'd feel differently?

As for the suggestion someone made for a genderless alien romance... Sure? I guess it would depend on the alien - their design, personality, and so on... I'd still consider that before I did an f/f romance. I might be open to a romance with a female character if I liked her enough (Cass and Miranda come to mind, but, alas, both were straight and I won't play male characters given a choice). But that's more because I like the character enough to want to see that side of them and for the sake of the story, rather than me wanting to romance them just for the romance's sake... if that makes sense?

Re-reading what I typed it does all seem a bit illogical. But that's really how I feel. Sexuality sure can be complicated...