DA 4 Romances! New info for real this time!!! Zom-bangin'?

I keep wondering, what is that thing in your avatar? It looks so fucking ridiculous but also strangely cute. lol

It's that dog thing from that movie.

Fizzgig!

I said realism, not incest!

Although...

Too many posts I want to comment, can't keep track of them all .

Favorite Romance:
Damn good question. Alistair was also my first intro to romancing in a game, so his awkward charm was so endearing. I actually grew to love the Solamance, because it was so unexpected. This is also why I don't want to do it again, let my Solavellan be the only one and the rest (hopefully) get to live happily ever after.

I nearly forgot that it doesn't have to be DA only. I think that Garrus is by far my favorite BW romance. It was so mature and natural. As someone else has already mentioned, they where friends first and then came the love, sneaking in. The mutual admiration, but without the pedestal. To me, they are equals and see each other as such. (Though I admit that a romanced Shepard will always miss the shot, because she knows how much it means to him to be the best . I also headcanon a conversation way later where she tells the truth and he confesses that of course he knew).

Also, I love the conversation on the last mission. I love the idea that they actually talk about having children, even if mostly jokingly. Especially that they are talking about it without the typical "I'm the female, so of course I'll drop everything and become a stay at home mom". I often feel like this is implied in most media.

About relating to romances in the game:
I feel the same way, except for friendship, not romance. I have a hard time getting/keeping friends, so having people (even fictional) talking about how I have helped them and they consider me their friend was an amazing boost to my usually low self-esteem.

Blackwall calling female Inquisitors "mylady"
For me it's all fine. I admit to liking the trope, but in DAI in particular, it's also a matter of accepting the Inquisitor for who she is. Mostly because I've only romanced him as a qunari and it was either her or a dwarf, I see it as him showing that he sees her as a woman and not a qunari/non-human .

Fenris:
I kinda felt like he should have been the one to do the pushing against the wall. He's spent his life as a dominated slave, I feel like this was his moment to take charge. I always end up feeling like he just settles into a role he's used to, rather than it being two consenting adults. I LOVE his romance, but this particular scene makes me a bit uncomfortable .

I kinda hope we do not meet him in DA4, 'cause I cannot take listening to him being devastated because Hawke got left in Fade in the same World State .

Side note:
Not romance related, but I LOVE that in Trespasser, Sera comments on how she's glad that Solas is gone, but also how she is sad on my Solavellan's behalf. Considering how she was pretty unfriendly whenever they talked about anything to do with Elves/Solas, it was nice to see her support her friend and accept that they have different beliefs even if she doesn't agree.

Also, I never imagined my Solavellan spending 2 years pining. Rather I imagined her doing her job and maybe occasionally pondering what happened for him to just leave. I imagine that she, like him, never expected to fall in love and therefore she just continues being single, not because she is waiting for him, but because she's just not interested. Not to mention, I like the fact the he's the one who fade-stalks her because he still likes her.

I find it kinda odd that people want to make Fenris Dominant in his romantic relationships just because he used to be abused by people. It twinges that feeling where people shame men for being submissive if that is there true preference lies. It twinges that feeling that submissive people are the most likely to be victimized and/or are a victim. Additionally that Aggression/topping = Dominant. I actually participate in Dominance and Submission as a daily part of my relationships and I like being on top AND being on the bottom. Because it's a physical position not a personality to me. I see trust in my partner's submission and I feel awe that he can give of himself. I feel motivated to be the sort of person who deserves that trust.

On it's face, the Fenris/Hawke relationship is egalitarian, I remember being pushed against a wall and then pushing him back.

Gosh, I hated that scene so much.

Ah, nah, I get what you're saying. Wasn't trying to say their head canon was wrong. So long as they don't insist that Fenris is absolutely a Dominant that would make Hawke submit 100% of the time.

AS a Femdom myself, I default to egalitarian in all the romances in DA but two.

1. Alistair is obviously a female-led kinda guy (not commenting about bedroom stuff, just relationship stuff). He gives up power to the newest recruit, a Cousland he marries is obviously doing all the political savvy maneuvering, and same for if he married Anora. Maybe he takes charge in the bedroom, maybe it's even in there, I get no vibe from either way on that front.
2. my personal head canon of Fenris is that submitting to my Hawke would be a bit of therapeutic catharsis- his habit is to give of himself. But instead of just taking like a slave owner would, I appreciate him and feed/give back to him what he needs. A symbiotic relationship. I envision him as a body guard, always watching, and his absolute adoration and habits going into a Super want to take care of you route.

But everyone else has been egalitarian for me. ^^

So...I should probably explain a few things before people get a wrong idea

I have hundreds of pieces of head canon, most of which switch and change hundreds of times as well
heck, I have trouble even settling on a character to play most of the time (which probably says something about me as a person )

I've...also never had an actual relationship irl...not a romantic one anyway (due to various reasons...I find trusting people...a bit hard)
games make me feel comfortable to explore such things safely, and due to my inexperience I tend to have various idealistic (and some not so idealistic) views about relationships

--
speaking of fictional character feelings...I had a wonder (please don't feel attacked for those who like to play this way)
but why is it alright for someone to change the sexual orientation of a fictional character to have them suit someone's needs, while it's frowned upon in real life?

After reading a certain Assassin’s Creed Odyssey leak, it reminds me how thankful to be to BioWare for at least trying to represent various sexual orientations as well as strive to represent more.

What was the leak? I was going to start Odyssey later today, so I might as well be prepared for disappointment. lol

My headcannons are absolutely everywhere for any of my characters. Only one that's static is my DAI character xD


You kicked the hornets nest, but I'm completely in the 'no it's not ok, ever, no matter what excuses people want to pull as for the reason' camp, sadly Bioware proved they think it is okay, so that's that debate over and done with *shrugs*.
If they pull it again I'll never buy another Bioware game. I can't support that message, I'm tentative with MEA because it .. it was very messy, and incredibly unpolished when it was released and even though they changed the character after release (pre-release does not count as it's still being developed, whereas on release and after it should be final), it could have evolved that way in development if they'd been given another year to polish the game and fix a ton of the writing issues, seeing as the development had so many disasters. Though that still falls in my "no excuses" frame of mind anyway.
Put more simply: do better next time, team + EA. Or rather, do not do that again...